It amazes me how much can happen in 9, short years. I mean, the first 9 years of my life were virtually uneventful as far as I could tell. But these last 9 years? Phew!
Tomorrow marks the 9th anniversary of the day I walked into a Phoenix courthouse a single woman, and walked out a married lady. 9 years. I'm still in complete awe. Especially when you take into consideration how our marriage came to be.
I met Daniel at work. The two of us worked in the marketing department at Sears. (Which is a fancy way of saying we put up the sale signs in the morning and rearranged displays in the afternoon.) Our boss needed a display done in the men's department and sent myself and my future spouse to go dress up some mannequins. The shirts needed ironing and this incredibly chauvinistic male of mine, said that was a woman's job. (I know, right? Why did I even marry this dude?) But I learned quickly that this guy could take all the crap that I dished out at him and give his own share in return. Our work relationship turned into one of competition and friendly banter. Finally, after having a conversation about who was better at video games (I was really into playing Fable at the time and he stupidly told me that he beat the game in a single day. The dork had never even played it before. lol), he finally challenged me to a showdown at Castles and Coasters. (A local arcade and theme park in Phoenix, AZ.)
I feel inclined to mention that he totally whipped my ass. (*Coughs* I let him win...)
Two weeks later, I was moving in with him. Now, that's normally not me. I don't just randomly move in with guys I just met like two months ago. But due to some extenuating circumstances that I won't air in public, I was suddenly without a home. I'd only been in Phoenix for a few months and I had no where else to go. I couldn't afford an apartment on the measly part-time, hourly wage I was making at Sears. So this seemed to be the only solution. (Thank God he wasn't a serial killer, huh?)
The November before we married, I found out I was pregnant. Terrified, I blurted out to him that I didn't want to be a single mother. That wasn't my way of asking for a proposal. I'm just the kind of person who doesn't have a filter and has a habit of saying what I was thinking. And at that moment, I was thinking that this guy could leave me at any time and I would be left utterly alone to raise a newborn. What the hell was I gonna do? In a move that was classic romantic Daniel, he took the amethyst ring that he'd bought me the week before, slipped it off my left hand, and put it on my right. Then he looked me in the eyes and asked me to marry him.
I smacked him.
No, seriously! I thought he was pulling my leg and I wasn't pleased by the joke. It took a few minutes to realize he was serious. Then I said yes.
A few weeks later, I woke up to the most intense pain in my stomach imaginable and I had no idea what it was. I tried everything that a person with gastrointestinal pain would do. But nothing worked. Daniel was upset with me because he thought I was trying to get out of grocery shopping that day. (Honestly, I don't blame him. Its something I would totally do.) He almost walked out the door, completely pissed off at me. His hand was on the doorknob when I fainted. I woke up to him screaming at me, paramedics talking around me, and being half carried down three flights of stairs. I'll never forget how utterly calm I was while he was completely terrified. Ectopic pregnancy. I remember telling the doctor that if it were at all possibly, I'd really like to live through this. His response was that he would make sure I stayed alive if he could deliver my first born. I really loved that doctor.
The next day I was home (completely groggy and high as a kite) and in one piece. Mostly. I'd lost a lot of blood. In fact, if I had been any later getting to the hospital, I would not be here today to retell this story. My abdomen looked like someone had taken a baseball bat and beat me repeatedly. It felt about as bad too.
But more than anything, my relationship with my then fiance changed drastically overnight. I went from the woman that he loved, to the woman he was terrified to lose. This whole near death thing was completely devastating to him. Looking back, it wasn't the best reason to get married. But luckily it worked out pretty well for us. I'm not a psycho hose beast, and he's not an axe wielding monster.
Two weeks after our wedding, we found out I was pregnant again. 9 months later, Dr. Oland (the man who performed my ectopic) delivered Jenny into the world. It wasn't much of a honeymoon period, and its taken a long time for us to REALLY get to know each other. But after 9 years, I can honestly say that there isn't anyone else in this world I can see myself with. Its been turbulent, messy, heartbreaking, gut wrenching, agonizing, and absolutely wonderful. There have been births, moves, fires, evictions, a brief period of homelessness, moments of great prosperity, and moments of total devastation. In a nut shell, its been life, and its been beautiful.
I've known more love in 9 years than some people know their whole lives. I've taken most of it for granted and have had moments where I wondered what it would be like if I hadn't gone on that first date. But the truth is, I don't want to know. I love this insane life. I love my family. I love my husband and all his crazy stubbornness. I wouldn't trade him for anything.
Happy Anniversary, Babycakes.
No comments:
Post a Comment